Tag Archives: story

On This Day


To the me on the left: You’re stubborn. You’re surrounded by people who love you. You’re brave and fierce and determined. You have value and you are worthy.  I know you are uncomfortable. Everything hurts. Nothing is easy. Not walking not sitting not standing not anything. Every career path you’ve tried, you’ve struggled at because in your head you feel like everyone you know is judging you because of your size. They weren’t, but it’s hard to change a mind set, and it’s hard not to project your insecurities.

To the me in the middle: You’re stubborn. You’re surrounded by people who love you. You’re brave and fierce and determined. You have value and you are worthy. You kept it going. The idea of being a personal trainer was still tucked away behind that head of curls and strange ideas. You were discovering, at around this point, that you enjoyed exercising. You enjoyed the fun runs, the weights, the treadmills and the spin bikes and the different things that your body was suddenly able to do.

To the me on the right: You’re stubborn. You’re surrounded by people who love you. You’re brave and fierce and determined. You have value and you are worthy. You’re almost there now. You’ve taken that idea of being a personal trainer, completed the first part of your qualification and started the second. You’ve learned that the number on the scale isn’t overly important, what’s important is having a goal broken into micro goals, and then achieving them. You thought that losing weight would help you to be happy with yourself, and with your body. But then you discovered the joy of excess skin and chafing and random clapping. What you’ve been working for is hidden by a daily reminder of what was. What’s important though, is that it’s there. Hidden, yes. But there. You’ve worked your arse off, literally.


*     *     *     *     *

Those memory things on Facebook, they come up every day to remind you or taunt you or embarrass you about what you were doing on this day in previous years. The memories only go back for as long as you have been on Facebook, which proves that there is life outside of social media. Or, that there was.

It was because of the On This Day feature that I realised for the first ever time that my regime of training, walking, running, lifting and generally moving was making a difference to my body. It was 12 months ago, on this day, apparently, that I made this realisation.

It was a photo of me in my Scout uniform shirt. It was the largest size shirt that I could purchase. You can see how it fits – it was tight. And I remember seeing that photo of myself and thinking, “Hang on, my Scout shirt doesn’t fit like that anymore!”. So I put on my shirt and took a photo and compared them, side by side. It was a pretty huge moment.

Anyway, that original photo popped up in my On This Day reel today. I’m not doing Scouts anymore – I finished up last year so that I could focus more on my shifting priorities. So for shits and giggles more than anything else, I went and found my shirt and popped it on.


The me on the left. The me in the middle. And the me on the right.





The Measure


I wanted to write a quick post mainly because The Biggest Loser kicks off tonight on Australian screens. If you’re not familiar with the show, a quick introduction: people apply/audition to be on the show based on their weight and wanting to change their lifestyle. Contestants are picked from the applications, and are then designated a group and a trainer for the group. The trainer generally yells and motivates the contestants through a variety of means. Contestants vomit, work hard, lose weight. Each week they weigh in and their weight loss is recorded. At first this is done either topless (men) or just in a sports bra (women). As they lose weight they start to wear singlets to the weigh ins. Then there’s a finale, and the person who has lost the greatest percent of their body weight wins.

The reason I want to write a blog in response to this is several-fold.

The Biggest Loser tends to encourage people to work on their fitness and lose weight. But you need to realise a couple of things.

1. You will not get the extraordinary weekly results that the contestants on The Biggest Loser get. There are several reasons why. The first is that the weigh ins are not actually weekly. I have read differing amounts of time between weigh ins, but in general they seem to be every ten days or even fortnightly. Not weekly. The second reason you will not get those same results is because the contestants are taking part in an extreme and gruelling exercise regime. We’re talking many hours in the gym per day. This is not sustainable in real life, because we have things like jobs and kids and partners and pets and washing.

2. If you are particularly well endowed in the chesticle region, you will struggle to find a sports bra that offers the required scaffolding to support the girls. Do your research, they are out there but you do need to work hard to find them. I got my first few online. They’re expensive but they are absolutely necessary.

3. Most importantly, is this: If The Biggest Loser inspires you to get moving, or even to jump on the scales and assess where things are at, remember this. There is no number on earth that will ever be an accurate measure of who you are as a human being. Not the number on the scale. Not the number on your clothing. Not even the number that represents your chronological age. You’re more than a number. You’re worth more than numerical digits that attempt to sum up your worth. I am worth no more at my weight now than I was before I started my weight loss adventure. I will always be thankful to who I was when I started, because she did the hard yards: walking into a gym for the first time. God, even just walking. You are more than a number. You are.

The Biggest Loser isn’t a bad thing. Not at all.

But it always helps to remember the reality behind reality television.



The Liebsters!


Imagine the grin on my head when I found ouit I’d been awarded a Liebster. For those wondering if this is a good thing, it is. From what I can tell, it’s a peer to peer award, and I was bestowed the honour from the ever delightful Cate from A Travelling Cook.

Here is what I like about blogging: There is a community. We all write, we all try to do the best we can, and for the most part we all do it for free. You read our words, you like them or share them or comment on them or just back away slowly. Cate, who gave me this Liebster, has put in the time and effort to comment and like a heap of my posts. And as awesome as it is that people are reading, I reckon most bloggers will agree that the comments and real feedback really give you a whopping big boost.

If you’re a commenter or a liker, thanks. You remind me I’m not writing into a vast nothingness.

So! On with the Liebster show!


As a part of this award, Cate has asked me to answer ten questions. And I, in turn, will nominate some other bloggers to sport the Liebster badge and answer my own queries. And so the cycle will continue, recognising one blog at a time.

1. What are you reading at the moment?

I’m reading a sign on the bookshelves that says DREAMS COME TRUE. Do they? I think they might. But really, would we be thrilled if they did? I have a habit of entertaining nightmares while I sleep, and I wouldn’t be stoked if they came true. I’m hoping it’s the good dreams that come true.

2. What was the last meal you cooked?

Grilled foccacia sambos for my beloved and I.

3. What country have you always wanted to visit?

I want to go to the UK one day, but to be honest I bloody love Australia. I’d also like to go to New Zealand. My family is from England, so there’s the obligation to go and check out my roots.

4. Recommend a TV show or box set.

OK. I’m watching a couple of series at the moment: Orange is the New Black, and an Aussie drama called Devil’s Playground. They’re very different but both make a powerful statement about the prisons we live in. Ooooh how insightful was that! One is set in a women’s prison, the other is set against the backdrop of the Catholic church.

5. Your favourite way to relax?

Guitaring. Playing with the fur babies. Drumming. Repeat.

6. What is your favourite dish to cook?

Probably a soup that has become known as Special Soup. It’s comforting, warm, filling and easy. For those not in the know, it’s lamb shank and barley soup with a shitload of veges. The besty’s mum makes it, she taught me, now I make it. Everyone loves it. Here’s a pic:

Image by The Naughty Corner

Image by The Naughty Corner

7. Early bird or night owl?

Both. I love mornings and I seem to have a fondness for late nights. It’s a bit of a lose-lose situation, now I think of it.

8. What is your favourite fruit?

After years of saying “mango”, the time has come to be realistic: My favourite fruit is actually the mandarin, with a good red apple coming in a close second. Either a Gala or a Sundowner, though I am quite fond of Jonathans and Eves.

9. What’s your drink of choice?

I fear I am becoming a bore. I honestly like water. But it must be cold and preferably have ice in it or be partially frozen. I have recently developed a taste for Vodka, sadly. Slurpees (frozen coke) have also been known to rock my world.

10. What would you choose for your last meal?

Something that gives me shocking intestinal worms and explosive wind so that my final act is indeed the trump card to end all trump cards.

And now! The nominees are (apparently you can nominate up to 8)…

1. A Little Bit Purry

2. Cupcakes, Shoes and Other Things

3. Great Snaps, Good Times and Me

Here are your questions!

1. What are you wearing on your feet, and please prove it via a photo.

2. Why do you blog?

3. Complete this sentence: “If __________ read my blog I would be totally stunned and I would love to ask them _____________”

4. What was the last mess you made and did you clean it up or just pretend it never happened?

5. If you could only write about one topic for a month, what would you want that topic to be?

6. And what topic would you hate to write about for a month?

7. If blogging was done via pen and paper, would you still do it? How important is technology to blogging?

8. Have you ever unpublished a post? If so, why? If not, what would make you do so?

9. Who is your blogging hero?

10. Write a limerick about blogging.