On the weekend, a new Bunnings Warehouse opened. For the uninitiated, Bunnings is a hardware store frequented by do-it-yourselfers, courting lesbians and Better Homes and Gardens aficionados. I took my beloved to Bunnings for Valentines Day a couple of years ago, and we dined in the Bunnings cafe. Nothing’s too good for my girl.
When the new Wallsend Bunnings opened, we were there. A couple of hours after the festivities, as we were in an old wares store. But we got there! And so the adventure begins…
I left a stool in a display toilet:
I was also given the
ridiculously short sighted very important task of holding a length of dowel. Such fun!
Seriously, how could she have not predicted this would happen?
It’s OK though, because she decided to use the basket for protection. She didn’t realise the sticker that was on it. Cue hilarity:
Yes. That sign is over her butt and says “PLUMBING”. She had no idea why I was laughing so hard. Ah, but the more observant among you will have noticed the large plank of wood she has under her right arm! That piece of wood has a Very Special Purpose, which I shall tell you about shortly.
Now, the Wallsend Bunnings has several things going for it: It’s clean, it smells nice, the staff aren’t completely jaded and bored with their positions, and the trolleys all go in straight lines. The floor is shiny and you leave feeling like you are equipped and able to construct a small town with guttering and individual paint colours. Nothing boosts confidence like the nod of a man in a red apron.
Anyway anyway, the plank of wood.
It was carefully selected:
It had to have very definite features, you see.
My wonderful beloved (who consents to each picture of her that I publish, by the way) is a bit crafty when it comes to planks of wood and piles of junk. She’s currently bashing out some State of Origin stuff. She’s making a clock and two plaques, to mark the first win by the NSW team in almost a decade. If you want one you should check out her Facebook page here. Even if you don’t want one, still check out her page and tell her you were sent there by The Naughty Corner. She might give you free shipping or something if you mention this blog. In fact, I just asked her and she said “Yeah, cool.”
Yes darling, it is cool. BUT NOT AS COOL AS THE STAMP AND BALLOON YOU SCORED AT BUNNINGS!!!!!!!